"The Saddest Music I KNOW."

*with a sad music background (The SADDEST MUSIC SOMEONE KNOWS)* "I've just remembered that knitwear happened... and I can't wear knitwear because... AHM ALLERGIC TO NITS."

I've just remembered that in winter you get rough round the lips... like carpet.
You get CARPET LIIIIPS.

And I've just remembered... that when you cut your nails... it feels FUNNY.

Oh...oh God.

And also, a memory what has just struck me... is that steel gives you STATIC ELECTRICIYY SHOCKS and it makes you feel ,like... someone's poked you... with skewer on elbows. OH GOD. WHY THE ELBOWS. WHY THE MOTHERFOKIN ELBOWS...?!?!?!?!?!

and...also... your bladder...

IT'S GOT NO GOLD IN, YOUR BLADDER.

and that's the saddest thing of ALL.